Apparently, post-masculine is a thing.


When you’re a man of a certain age, you read things that make you go, What?!

Apparently, post-masculine is a thing.

No one told me about this, but literature about it abounds.

Suddenly, things I used to feel shame for are vogue, and men are embracing their softer, tender, spiritual side. Imagine: after years of talking to the witch-doctor about how shabby I feel being part of a community that fetishizes hyper-masculinity; or how inadequate I am when I’m in a locker-room; or how hurt I am when someone makes fun of the way I walk; or how embarrased I get when told how I sound when I speak — now men are embracing their vulnerable, creative, and nurturing sides; except I can’t seem to find any of them in my neighborhood.

No matter. In this age of canker and snark, it’s good to know there are men beyond my phone’s radar scans who subscribe to Marcus Aurelius‘s and the stoic’s philosophy of being the best man one can be.

Now, if someone, please, could explain all this to me, I’d very much appreciate it. Discuss…

Marcus Aurelius.jpg

About the author Walter

Walter lives and works in and around South Florida. When not practicing or studying acupuncture, you can find him at one of Miami’s beaches, or in a coffee shop lost in the pages of a good book. Walter enjoys diverse interests such as reading Tarot, practicing Qi Gong and Tai Chi, learning Buddhist dharma, practicing shamanic healing, writing for his blogs, reading Oriental philosophy, traveling to new places and old favorites, exploring contemplative photography with his iPhone, sitting quietly in meditation, practicing healthy fitness, and promoting wellbeing.

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  1. Actually, I don’t believe this is a sudden, only recent movement among men; I seem to remember the start of something like what you describe some time ago. Straight men relaxed into guys who could change a diaper (the changing stations in mens’ rooms seem to me to be at least a decade old by now); not spend the entire weekend in front of the TV watching various heavily “armored” slabs slamming into each other but spend time with the children; and admit to having emotions by actually showing them. None of this happened as I was growing up in the ’50s; I was told that showing emotions was unmasculine and that, when I was troubled or attacked for liking opera and having no interest in sports, I had to behave as a good little soldier and shove my emotions back down my throat.

    Frankly, I think many if not most men were relieved to be able to express a softer, more human side to their personalities. Accepting that I was gay was much easier to do in this newly relaxed, emotionally accepting atmosphere. I also think the gay and women’s liberation movements had a lot to do with the creation of the New Man. I like him (I have occasionally has a fling with him) and I think he’s more comfortable in his skin than his predecessors.

    1. True! What I marvel at is the sudden predominance of literature about it. I believe this is a positive thing for men. For too long we have been told to be this or act thus. The irony, I find, is in the gay community, with its cult of hyper-masculinity, and how it fetishizes and worships looking like and behaving in ways that seem contrary to the self-awareness movement. Thank you for reading, Willym; I always find your musings illuminating. XO

  2. I love the quote you included at the end. I went to a yoga class last week and I was the only male in the class. Years ago I would have been self-conscious feeling like I should be doing something more macho. Times are changing I think, and for the better. I just wish I would have been born 20 years later so I wouldn’t have had to go through my awkward teen years trying to be that macho man that I really wasn’t. Thanks for your post!

  3. I was delighted to see you are posting !
    I would not worry about the various man vogue is happening
    stick with the basics < courage, honor, mastery, strength – and a zest for life.

  4. Don’t worry, post-post-masculine will be here before you know it!!!

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